## I met a man on London Bridge. He tipped his hat and drew his cane. In this limerick I’ve said his name.

His name is Andrew.

Today and Tomorrow.

## A guy has 379 eggs. You take away 37. How many do you have?

37, because you took 37.

Squeak

## Why don’t horses wear gloves?

They don’t have hands.

## How many seconds in a year?

12 because of the 2nd of January, 2nd of February. etc.

## How can a man go eight days without sleep?

By sleeping at night.

Mailbox

## You have a fox, a chicken and a sack of grain. You must cross a river with only one of them at a time. If you leave the fox with the chicken he will eat it; if you leave the chicken with the grain he will eat it. How can you get all three across safely?

Take the chicken over first. Go back and bring the grain next, but instead of leaving the chicken with the grain, come back with the chicken. Leave the chicken on the first side and take the fox with you. Leave it on the other side with the grain. Finally, go back over and get the chicken and bring it over.

## When does 1+1 not equal 2?

When you are wrong.

It gets wet.

## A knave and a knight walk into forest, they find a page on the ground showing them a map to a tree house, they get there and rest in the tree house, in the morning 6 hands climbed down the ladder, who climbed down the ladder?

The Knave, the Knight and the page.

## Be quick and say the first thing that comes to your head. What do cows drink?

Water, cows don’t drink milk.

## Why did Cinderella get kicked out of the football team?

Because she ran away from the ball.

## Tell me the three continuous days without using Sunday, Wednesday and Friday?

Yesterday, today and tomorrow.

Medallions!

## Why don’t penguins live in England?

Because they’re scared of Wales!